The abandoned and the awakened: Books turns spotlight on Yashodara, Buddha's forgotten wife

New Delhi, Jun 23 (PTI) Siddhartha Gautama walked away from royalty and family in search of truth -- and became the Buddha. His story is etched in history and the spiritual annals of millions. But what about Yashodara, the wife and mother of a newborn son, he left behind? That’s where "The Illusion of Illusions: The Story of Yashodara, Buddha's Wife" by Sunita Pant Bansal comes in. The new book tells the story of the courage and silent resilience of the woman remembered only as “the wife Siddhartha left behind".

But her story is far more complex and layered, said the author who sets out to give voice to an untold story.

“Yashodara’s story also falls into the long and painful pattern of historical overshadowing, where the women closest to iconic men are either erased, simplified, or remembered only in relation to the men they were attached to…,” Bansal told PTI.

"History tends to spotlight the ones who left, who acted, who preached, who conquered, and rarely the ones who stayed, endured, reflected, or transformed quietly. In spiritual narratives too, the focus has largely been on renunciation as the ultimate act of courage,” she added.

Bansal, whose bestselling books include "Everyday Gita", "On the footsteps of Buddha", and "Krishna: The Management Guru", described Yashodara as a mother, a seeker, and eventually a spiritual adept in her own right who was cast into the margins.

The idea behind “The Illusion of Illusions” is to “pull Yashodara out of the shadows, not as a footnote to the Buddha’s story, but as a luminous presence in her own right".

The result is a 211-page story in Yashodara's own voice, beginning with her encounter with an enlightened Buddha and ending with her attaining nirvana before him.

The book explores the gamut -- ranging from a fairytale wedding to her witnessing her husband's transformation from a reserved prince to a man with a mission, along with the many "red flags" she overlooked during their 13 years of marriage.

It traces her overwhelming grief when Siddhartha leaves on the very day their son Rahul is born, her sorrow as her seven-year-old son leaves to join his father in the Sangha (community of Buddhist practitioners), and ultimately her quiet yet courageous journey towards acceptance and forging her own path.

According to Bansal, Yashodara's account could have been easily told through "betrayal, bitterness, or fury". However, she chose to highlight Yashodara's strength, her rebellion and finally her resilience.

"Her quiet refusal to reduce herself to victimhood was central to how I envisioned her. Yes, she grieves. Yes, she questions. But she does not let those emotions harden into resentment. Why? “Because I saw her as someone who, over time, begins to understand that Siddhartha’s path, however painful for her, was not about abandoning her, but about seeking something larger than both of them," the author explained.

Telling the story of someone who has largely been confined to footnotes or fragments in Buddhist texts and folklore is no easy task.

Bansal, who undertook the painstaking work of drawing from early Pali sources, later Buddhist commentaries, and regional retellings, acknowledged the challenges in writing what she described as not biography or a scripture but a "blend of history, imagination and emotional truth".

"The biggest challenge was the silence itself, the absence of detail, of voice, of first-hand insight into Yashodara’s mind. That silence gave me space, but it also came with responsibility. I had to inhabit that silence with care.

"Fiction, in such a context, becomes a form of respectful restoration. I used creative license to give emotional flesh to the truth… to imagine what it might have felt like to be Yashodara, the wife, the mother, the abandoned, the awakened," she explained.

Besides Yashodara, the book offers a deeper look into the lives of other lesser-known women figures who played significant roles in the couple's story. These include Buddha’s aunt and foster mother Mahaprajapati Gautami as well as Yashodara’s mother Pamita, who is also a distant cousin of Siddhartha’s father King Shuddhodana.

That said, the strong cast and Siddhartha's towering presence don't overshadow Bansal's intent. Yashodara stays firmly at the centre, never eclipsed.

"When you write about the lesser-known partner in a legendary relationship... it’s easy for the gravitational pull of his legacy to take over the story. But I was clear that this was Yashodara’s journey, not an echo of his.

"Ultimately, the challenge was not to dim Siddhartha’s light, but to reveal that Yashodara had a light of her own, one that did not compete, but completed the story. And I think that’s what makes her journey all the more profound," she added.

Having completed the arduous task of writing the book, Bansal now dreams of seeing it adapted for the screen.

In fact, a few informal conversations about adapting the book for film or television are already underway.

"What gives me hope is that we are now in a moment where audiences are ready, even hungry, for layered female narratives... If told with care, I believe her story will not only resonate, but also heal, by offering a new lens on history as well as the human heart," Bansal said.

In addition to authoring numerous children's books on scriptures and folk literature, she has penned over two dozen books for adults and young readers decoding the philosophy of mythology.

"The Illusion of Illusions: The Story of Yashodara, Buddha Wife", priced at Rs 295, is available for purchase across online and offline stores. It is published by Rupa and endorsed by the likes of celebrated filmmaker Mahesh Bhatt and bestselling author Anand Neelakantan. PTI MG MIN MIN